Sunday, 19 April 2015

Project Cov

Ever since moving here in September, a house party was always expected to happen. Finally we got round to organising it as a last proper piss-up before exams start, not that I have any.

It was expected that around 30 people would come around 10pm (an hour after the official start time) with some +1s with them to fill out the house. What actually happened was that at 10:30pm the actual occupants of the house and a few close mates were sat twiddling their thumbs, drinking their alcohol and questioning whether the lights they had very specifically placed were OK. The first twinges of concern were starting to build into whether anyone would be there to appreciate the very specifically placed lights and enjoy our quality company. 

By 11:30 a considerable amount of people had arrived and the party was starting to become less of a little chatter between friends and an actual party. Shots were being shot, dance moves were being moved by those already quite drunk and the beer bong was in full use.

At midnight I went outside to do the bong and out of determination not to make a tit of myself, focused incredibly hard on it. It was only after my alcohol consumption that I heard 'ain't nobody f-ing with my clique' being chanted from the living room by a huge amount of people. It was on investigating this that I found that the house had become rammed with people, half of which I did not recognise let alone know. When I asked who they were they often replied with 'why do you want to know?'. I calmly explained how I was a tenant of this house for which they replied with 'ahh sorry, good party'. 

In the living area there was at least 30 people in it which is about 25 more than has ever been in it before. The playlist we had carefully put together was now off and black American rap was being screamed out by a huge group of lads. I had had no idea who they were apart from one individual. Ashley Powell, a person I had come to know quite well over the last few years, was jumping up and down in the middle of the group like an intoxicated kangaroo. We did make eye-contact for him to shout a Kanye West lyric at me, which seemed rather innapropriate with him being incredibly white. 

The rest of the night followed as described above with shots, beer bongs, dancing, singing/ rapping and drunk conversation eating the hours away. I had somehow begun talking to two Polish people in my incredibly inconsistent and over confident Polish. They said I was 'very good' but their faces told a different story. 

At around 3:30am many of the people had left and it became mine and the other hosts responsibility to finish off the remaining alcohol. This was a mixture of beer, cider, shots and a Polish beverage called bimber which at 70% was described by Liam Quinn (another accomplice from back home) as 'nuclear cat piss'. By this point everyone was incredibly drunk and drinking now was more of a challenge than a pleasure. Mr Powell had now made plenty of new friends and spent a good few hours rapping to all his favourite gangster tracks. I did have my 5 minutes of fame orchestrating Wonderwall by Oasis on my guitar standing on one of the sofas to about 15 people screaming 'AGAIN' as I gave myself an encore.

It is fair to say the clean up the following day was awful. There was a stickiness to every possible surface, still full cans on every table and chair and for some reason the kitchen wreaked of balsamic vinegar with cracked eggs and straws littering the floor. The hangover alongside this mess was equally as bad with my head feeling like it was about to implode and my mouth feeling as if I had been eating sand all night. There was obviously a full fry up the following morning but this only intensified the feeling of vomit beginning to rise in our bellies. 

However, regardless of the hangover, the state of the house after and the damage it had done to my student loan it was such an insane night. I witnessed awful rapping, a brilliant consumption of booze and someone so drunk they tried to switch off the light on the wall with their feet as they lay drooling in their own mess.


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