Some serious writing commences- Novel update #1

Now that the prologue and chapter one have been completed, I had the idea of keeping a sort of diary, a blogdate if you will, of how the novel is progressing. This is for the reasons that I can share with those of you who are reading this in how it is going and also that I can sit back and reflect on my work in pride, though I am  merely 5,000 words in with 75,000 to go...

I have to admit that the prospect of writing something as gargantuous as a novel was first of all exciting. To be able to hold an actual book of some density and say I DID THIS! was the immediate appeal. The idea of creating a story for someone to read, characters to divulge into and provide a revolutionary book of deep meaning and purpose,yada yada yada... that was nice but not all too important at the time.

It was not until I began writing chapter one that nerves began to kick in like a kick in the bollocks. Both painful and unnecessary.




Chapter 1 is done!(ish).

The first draft of chapter 1 is done. It has been sent off to the guy who's given me the opportunity to do this for his feedback and redrafting. Though this is not to say that it was as easy as sitting down and typing away.

To summarise...

700 words in I restarted. 300 words into the second attempt I thought it was all crap and deleted it. On the third attempt I followed the pattern of a novel of the same genre and it off started much better. Then everything started to go inside out, inside in, outside in and outside out,

Tense began to confuse me, words began to confuse and life became a big disappointing piece of shit when I realised that writing something like this was not going to come out of me like air. Every word I typed seemed wrong. My description felt cheap and cliche. The way I hit the keys on the keyboard felt wrong. And all this in the first chapter!

I felt demotivated and stupid. As if I shouldn't have taken on this project. But I laboured on and eventually finished it.

I was happier with it than I imagined. It started to read like a novel and something a little greater than my previously thought skill level. So before I started to question what I had done, I gave it a quick once over for spelling etc and deemed it was ready to send. Happy with my resilience and first breakdown recovery.

When it came to clicking to send, I was terrified and hesitant. More than sending off any piece of coursework I have done at university where things such as a plagiarism, failure, embarrassment or some other life threatening result could occur. And even though I knew I was sending it to someone who would give me quality feedback and do it in such a manner that I wouldn't collapse emotionally and destroy every piece of creative work I have ever done, I still felt an air of pessimism as it came up with 'Sent'.

Almost immediately he replied saying that he would get round to reading it in the next couple of days when he found some time and that he was greatly looking forward to it.

I was happy with this, knowing I could rest my mind from the novel for a couple days and focus on doing nothing.

However, to my surprise, two hours later he emailed me again.

His name popped up on my phone and a sense of dread filled me, not knowing why he felt the need to email me again.

Thinking the worst, I read on.

'Matt. Couldn't resist it and had to read it tonight. My first impression - I love it! Really well done.'

I cannot begin to describe the relief felt and looking back, I did not have any particular reason to be really worried. I had sent him my best work and with all my effort put into it. But I always prepared myself for the worst so that anything above this would lift me into a cloud of complete ecstasy.

I was and am still on that cloud.

My writing style was correct. My understanding of what he wanted was bang on. My added story fillers worked. Everything was spot on.

I now am awaiting for his feedback, which he promised would be minor, so that I can alter it to final copy. Then within the next couple of days I will begin chapter two. A chapter I am now far more confident about approaching.

 So to conclude I have finally taken the first major step. Now it's time for me to learn to jog.

Goodbye Clarkson; burnt by his own flame

Today it was announced that Jeremy Clarkson has indeed been 'dropped by Top Gear'. In other words the BBC have sacked their most valuable asset and you can't argue that it was the only option.

I absolutely love Clarkson and it is because of his controversial humour that I watch Top Gear. I have always believed that he is the one character out of the three that leads the show. James May and Richard Hammond are necessary to assist him but you could argue they are replaceable. I don't think you will find another Clarkson and here is why I think so.

Some claim Clarkson provides a link to the old fashioned british humour that we don't see as much anymore. His attitude towards global warming is refreshing in a climate where everyone is 'green' obsessed. I am not saying that global warming is something that should be ignored but when it is being rammed down your throats it is sometimes quite nice to hear someone mocking an issue we are told will end us all.

His way of addressing the audience, his strong and controversial opinions and his sheer manner cannot be ignored and it leads us to listen to him. In a society whereby everyone in the media is trying to say something to gain popularity or to abide by political correctness, I think in Clarkson we had that one figure who did the opposite. What is unfortunate is that it is because of this that we might not be seeing him for a while.

He has had his entire career riddled with controversy which, for me at least, lead me to follow him even more. I found myself being fascinated in what he was going to say or do next. To be honest I don't really have much interest in cars or anything like that. I only watched Top Gear to see what the three did or had to say. And even though I have watched every episode to date I can't help but watch the endless repeats on Dave and it looks like that is all I will be able to do now.

However, in the end it is a huge shame that this whole thing has happened but lets face it, if you punched a colleague at work you would not expect to have your job. The BBC had been put in a position whereby they either thought of the commercial side of things or their values. Obviously the BBC prides itself of being incredibly middle minded and politically and this leads to us saying goodbye to Clarkson but only for the time being. He will be back and he will be more loved for it. Another channel will buy him and I'm pretty sure Hammond and May too and will be seeing his humour and refreshing personality on a television pretty soon.

So to finish off I say thank you Mr Clarkson for everything you have contributed to my Sunday evenings and I think most of all, smashing Piers Morgan in the face and shutting him up for a bit.

The next step to the rest of your life

Today I went to a lecture for a module called 'Career and Project Planning' and this yet again reignited that same old fear and question, 'what you are doing as a career?'

When the lecturer spoke about careers I couldn't help but think to myself, 'should I know what I am going to do? Does everyone else know?' The simple answer to this is NO. I have considered teaching, writing, marketing and journalism throughout the last few years. I had even considered becoming a solicitor but after taking A-level Law that quickly changed. But none of these paths ever felt like a concrete decision.

Now it almost seems cliche that in the media there is always that same old saying, 'oh it is so much harder for the youth today' or 'it's a tough world out there'. These seem to me to be both patronising and unnecessarily negative. Those who say this in aim of support seem to make us seem like we are unaware that the economy is shot, politicians are, most the time, snobby, wealthy and old-fashioned idiots and that jobs seem to be impossible to come by. However, whenever you ask about your uncles, aunties or whoevers jobs, they always seem to be in some position doing something peculiar which I have never heard of. Or have you ever asked a mate what their parents do for them to reply, 'I'm not sure really'?

It is only when you sit back and think about what you're going to do that you realise that no matter what you decide to do now or within the next 5-10 years, when you're 50+ you will, 80% of the time, be doing something completely different. So in essence, for the time being the most important thing is to just get some income so you can enjoy your 20s at least with little concern and take your time and explore the different opportunities that are out there.

The best example I can give is that of my auntie. She came out with a degree in art, a degree often discredited as being a waste of time! She has now worked her way up to a position that earns a very respectable salary as head of a marketing team in the company she works for.

I would like to find someone who has come out of uni with a degree in any of the arts to say 'I'm doing this to get into business' or, and perhaps more importantly, for someone to tell me that a degree in one subject will stop me from getting a job in another.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that whether you have 1 GCSE in travel and tourism or whether you have a 1st in Biomechanical science, don't believe that you have to find the career that will be paying for your pension in 50 years time right now!

Just sit back and have a think at something you would like to do long term whilst working in something for the time being. Then when you put yourself in a position that when a opportunity comes about, take it!

I will for the next 2 years be under pressure to find a career path and I will be working hard to find one. But I don't think this ideology of 'sort the rest of your life right now!' will help.

It is a big, ugly world out there but as long as you work hard at whatever job you are doing, or just to get a job, for the time being it wont be so ugly to you. And if you find yourself doing a job you hate, just stick at it but work your arse off to get that opportunity to get to the next step in your career.


For the time being I will fill myself with knowledge of career paths and focusing on getting the degree in the first place. And at the weekends, just do what most university students do...

                                    (This an old photo by the way, now I have one in each hand.)